Away Messages, Funny Away Messages for AIM and ICQ

Away Messages, Funny Away Messages for AIM and ICQ
Away messages are important because you know damn well all your so-called buddies are snooping around to see what you're up to. Well here at College Downtime we've thousands of funny away messages for AIM, ICQ, MSN; hell, you can use these away messages for any instant message program you want. We're always adding new away messages, whether they're funny, clever, or boring, because variety is the spice of life. We hope you enjoy our massive and ever-growing funny away message collection and enjoy College Downtime!

Away Message Categories
Bathroom Eating Funny Random Insults Life Put Your Thinking Cap On Getting Drunk Phone Love Homework Sexual Shopping Sleeping TV

You have stumbled upon some of the Funniest AOL MSN and YAHOO Away Messages on the internet! Obviously you can see for yourself that we are looking to get the highest quality AOL MSN and YAHOO Away Messages that you use yourself. Feel free to use ours and please submit one of your own. Here at College Downtime we are trying to build the biggest and best humor website on the planet. So if you have any funny, serious, or just plain offensive AOL MSN OR YAHOO Away Messages submit them now.

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1	Slam your beer there are sober children in India right now!
2	24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case, coincidence?
3	One tequilla, two tequilla, three tequilla...FLOOR!
4	Getting crunked! Leave me one!
5	Celebrating St. Patrick's Day! Yeah so what, I know it's only (insert date).
6	Officer I swear to drunk I'm not god.
7	Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
8	Drinking my problems away.
9	If you can read this message without any trouble, you obviously have a lack of alcohol.
10	You can always retake a class but you can never relive a party.
11	I don't have drinking problems, I am just very thirsty.
12	Partying all night leads to great stories all next day.
13	Sleep all day, Party all night.
14	Reality is only an illusion that occurs due to a lack of alcohol.
15	I'm not as think as you drunk I am.
16	I'm at my computer, I'm just too drunk to type anything meaningful right now.
17	College: Producing the most educating alcoholics since 1892.
18	Doing what every religeous man would be doing.... im out at the local bar conducting a ceremony praying to the porcilan gods... Join in or be lame and leave a msg
19	Shit happens when you party naked. (Submitted by SteelerFan232)
20	"It's OK officer.... they didn't drink as much as I did!"
21	"I'm not drunk. I'm just exhausted from a long night of drinking." - Peter Griffin
22	hide the law, the beers here
23	I’m at college, what do you think I’m doing SDTRUIDNYKIINNGG!!!!!!! Enlarge Studying, shrink Drinking
24	Sorry officer, I had to drive, I couldn't walk.
25	I smoke POT to forget my drinking problems
26	Out to save the world...one jack and coke at a time.
27	Is it a crime that i perfer the Champaigne insted of the King...It's all about the HIGHLIFE!
28	Getting Ripped and I don't mean lifting either.
29	Anyone adding some information about last night, let me know, cause I have no idea what happened last night
30	Beer is like an old man's penis, You just can't beat it...
31	Im drunk and im in la la land, you should come visit its great there.
32	Gone hunting in America... I will bring you back a couple of skinned Americans...
33	Hi, my name is Joshua and I am an aspiring alcoholic. Tonight I will take my first step in a long journey to reach my destiny of destroying my liver. I dreamof the day when my skin is yellow and my gums are eroded from vomitting. One morning I will wake up next to an ugly fat chick and think to myself," What happened? did i get her pregnant? Just how many illegitamit kids do I have and why does my butt hurt? On that day I know i will have gotten there, to the state I strive to be in life. :-!
34	GOD bless guinness, most fucking amazing shit in the world, I'd take a pint over any girl ,any day
35	snowww Yeeeaaaah!!!!:-D, just imagine me prancing around outside with those big flakes falling...ahhhhhh,hahahahah I am a snow angelO:-), i think its time to lay off the booze
36	so mass was frigin packed ao my family left and instead....went to the bar:-D, really!!! and got some wings and tall boys for the beer of the month, now I ma off to the x-mass eve party with the fam and oh boy am i ready, sweet sweet guiness:-!
37	When you see me tonight, politely remind me I have class tomorrow.
38	Killin Brain cells!
39	I have decided to stop drinking today. For every bottle of whiskey I own I will drink one glass then poor the bottle out. For every wine bottle I have I will poor a drink out and lick the bottle. Fore every glass of beer I poor I will drink another bottle of wine. 4 every wine of bottle I poor I will poor another bottle of drink for one more glass of champagne. phor beer glass drink I ppour in I glass drink it for the one i had today....... I drinking today stop another poor of glass in the drinky please!
40	Collage! what a wonderful thing. The high honers of a prestigous ivy legue school, the wonderful class disgussions, the football games they cheerlearders, the friend fo frij ever! the indipeosdiance, ta partysg de booooozzzzze goddamnmi0t i luf kalloge?
41	In the immortal words of The Doors: "SHOW ME THE WAY TO THE NEXT WHISKEY BAR, OH DONT ASK WHY, OH DONT ASK WHY, SHOW ME THE WAY TO THE NEXT WHISKEY BAR, FOR IF WE DONT FIND THE NEXT WHISKEY BAR...I TELL YOU WE MUST DIE, I TELL YOU WE MUST DIE"-Jim Morrison. RIP
42	If 1 and 1 is 2 then 2 and 2 is 4 but why am i on the floor, oh wait its the to-kill-ya i had at 1 and 1 then 2 and 2 and 4 is when i met the floor
43	the last 3 drunk commentsa aere fropm me DJPHDUBBYA@aol.com I am waisted at the comp bored and need ing so me help, thansk you for the patronage and be well my brogthsers!
44	Why drink the house, when you can be living the High Life
45	Error alcoholic : We're sorry but the user you are trying to access is too drunk to answer your IM at this time. Please try again later and maybe he/she will have run out of alcohol by then and will be able to answer your IM.
46	Some people say that you're funnier when you are drunk...I'm out testing to see if that's true.
47	Teen drinking is very bad ... Yo, I got a fake ID dog!
48	Out drinking-peace
49	To alcohol. The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems. ~Homer Simpson
50	When we drink, we get drunk. when we get drunk we fall asleep. when we fall asleep we commit no sin. when we commit no sin, we go to heaven. sooooo, lets all get drunk and go to heaven O:-) .
51	(YOUR NAME) was here but left for a beer!
52	Don't drink and drive...You might hit a bump and spill your drink....Out Partying...Leave a Message....:-D
53	Hey, i'm not drunk you shilly sit!
54	Army Salvation! Army Salvation! Put A Penny In The Drum, Save Another Drunkin Bum!
55	If quitters never win, and winners never quit, then who came up with "Quit while you're ahead"?
56	Take me drunk. I am home.
57	Yesterday, scientists for the FDA suggested that men take a look at their beer consumption, considering the results of a recent analysis revealing the presence of female hormones in beer. The theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women. To test the finding, 100 men were given 6 cans of beer each. It was then observed that 100% of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional, couldn't drive, failed to think rationally, argued over nothing, and refused to apologize when wrong. No further testing is planned.
58	Aren't you cool! I want everyone to know how drunk I was last night too!
59	A drunk girl's words are a sober girl's thoughts... Wait for me to come back, and see what I have to say ;)
60	Getting drunk is a skill, alright!?!
61	Let me check my watch.....Yup right on time for killing my liver and lungs before I graduate.
62	24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence?? - I think not!
63	Just tell Nemo you couldn't find him 'cause you were out getting drunk. He'll understand. \|r\|e\|s\|p\|o\|n\|s\|i\|b\|i\|l\|i\|t\|y\| Your anti-drug.
64	Urinating ... with drinking in between =)
65	Officer, I swear there's no blood in my alcohol stream.
66	Life is a waste of time. Time is a waste of life. So lets all get wasted, And have the time of our lives!
67	I live for the nights I'll never remember with the friends I'll never forget!
68	When you get pulled over and the cop says "Your eyes look red have you been drinking?" repond with "Well officer your eyes look glazed have you been eating doughnuts?"
69	Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, 'It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than to be selfish and worry about my liver.' --Jack Handey
70	There are no absolutes in life or love -only vodka
71	I'm not as think as you drunk I am!
72	A Is for Alochol, B is for beer. For one of those reasons, I am not here.
73	Some people say that your more fun when your drunk. I'm off to go see if thats true... gone drinking.
74	WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a disgruntled peanut..
75	Officer I swear to drunk im not god.
76	When life hands you lemons....grab the tequila and salt:)
77	God made pot, Man made beer. Who do you trust?
78	Whiskey is yellow, Vodka is clear, But I ain't got neither of those, So I'm drinkin me a beer.
79	Now I lay me down to sleep with an empty bottle of vodka at my feet if I die before I wake tell my girls I drank it straght.